Russian

I'm trying not to be a hater, but every time I pick up my Russian textbook, or study with my friend Elina, I want to throw the book across the room and pick up my Czech text instead. I just don't like it. I wish it wasn't true, but I can't help myself. I don't like how it sounds and I don't like how I have to contort my mouth to make sounds like ы ш ль- ы especially, which to me mimics the noise that people with cerebral palsy make when they want something. Czech has become this comfortable thing for me; I like the sounds and I spent a long time teaching my mouth how to make them. I guess this wasn't always the case. I used to think Czech sounded harsh and I couldn't say ch, ě, ň and ř (ok, in certain combinations I still can't) but no matter how much I tell myself that Russian will grow on me like Czech did, I can't help but feel like it's an invader being forced on me and getting between me and my Czech. Czech and I are in a relationship Russian, and you're the third wheel!!! Perhaps the worst part is that, while I generally feel stupid trying to speak a foreign language, Russian reduces me to feeling like a 2nd grader again as I learn to read and write for a second time. Someone help me not to feel enraged by this. I really need to learn Russian for practical reasons, but at the moment it's like pulling eyelashes.